Week 4: Response to Jen Geiger

Forever the cynic Jen. I always respect your honesty and willingness to admit what many of us don't. We don't know it all and we're not even close. I feel the way you do sometimes in many situations. Your post reminded me, however, of something I read in the book The Four Agreements. I may have mentioned this in a previous post, but I'll post the quote here anyway:

"It is very interesting how the human mind works. We have the need to justify everything, to explain and understand everything, in order to feel safe. We have millions of questions that need answers because there are so many things that the reasoning mind cannot explain. It is not important if the answer is correct; just the answer itself makes us feel safe. This is why we make assumptions. We make all sorts of assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions."

Maybe we are all trying way too hard to figure everything out. Maybe there isn't an answer to everything or maybe instead of assuming all we need to do is ask. I find myself forgetting to just straight out ask sometimes. Have you tried that approach with this young man?

By the way, I loved the bluntcard.

Wk4_Reading: inspiration and "we"

Image by codepinkhq in Flickr/ CC

I was brought to tears with Ben's teaching moment with his kids before he went to NASA and the response from the NASA personnel.   The kids really hit it on the head that we all need inspiration, and music and science on the cutting edge and pushing the envelope is inspiring.  It got me thinking that each one of us has the capability or in Ben's terms the possibility within us to inspire each other.  There is no scarcity of inspiration, but it builds and awakens in every person we contact.  Wonderful.

But I found myself boggled as well.  How would Ben and Roz engage with an enemy?  A person determined to be hostile no matter what?  I know Jesus said to forgive 70 times 7 but I find myself losing patience with people much before then.  After a couple chances, I tend to write people off.  And without delving into too many details, it's happened with a student.  This person was just prickly.  Mean.  He'd try to hit on the girls in class but would insult them without mercy when rebuffed.  He was loud about his hatred of homosexuals, and used his freedom of religion as an excuse to offend others in our class.

available at bluntcard.com

What would the Zanders do?  How would they write the story of "we?"  I understand that it is necessary to create that framework of we but how to do it?  I tend to be cynical and jaded like this poster:


Did I mention that on a field trip, after the announcement was made to board the bus with no food, this kid bought an ice cream and when I directly instructed him to come along since everyone else had boarded, he didn't even look up and muttered, "Hold
on, ________."  And the parents, when called just sounded bored?  And did I mention this family attends a church I used to attend and I think I scapegoated this kid (who undeniably acted poorly) with all of my stereotypes about these fake, preachy, holier-than-thou-people?

How do I get out of my own way and we-write this, giving this kid a chance to be an actual human being with which I could have a relationship?